So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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