why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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