grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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