Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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