Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
