I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
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I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
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Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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