your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I have aggressive nipples.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
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