i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
