rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Randomize
