the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize