I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
