hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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