I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
