Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
