I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
