Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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