I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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