Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Just pee around me
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
