wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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