'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
