i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
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Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
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I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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