if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize