Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize