your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
