Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
