dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
