Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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