Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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