Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
