Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
