THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
