i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?