Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
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