Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
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