so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
