he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Randomize
