they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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