i always forget guys have bellybuttons
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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