You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
We got so high we made milksteak
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Randomize
