The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
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Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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