I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
zippers are such a cool invention
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
