No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
