South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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