i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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