Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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