I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Randomize
