I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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