He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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