Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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