OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
