We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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